


May Your Forever Be Blissfully Short

by immortalpramheda



Category: Westworld (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-11
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2019-06-08 18:59:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 19,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15249894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/immortalpramheda/pseuds/immortalpramheda
Summary: Logan wanted to expose his brother-in-law and protect his niece, but all of his pain and trauma was weighing too heavy on him.





	1. Logan

**Author's Note:**

> Kind of like a prequel to when we're first introduced to Emily in S2. This delves into her backstory and her relationship with her uncle Logan, and also a little more into Logan's backstory.

Logan descends the grand staircase of his father’s mansion. He sees the servants below tidying and setting up for the party.

 

He locates his father across the room. From behind he looks frail and old, his body shuddering when he coughs. But Logan knows that he is going to live for a while still. He’s been sick for almost half of his life. He seems to be immortal. Almost.

 

He sneaks up behind his father and taps him on the shoulder. He turns with an unamused look on his face.

 

“It’s your big day, dad,” Logan says, patting him on the shoulder. “You’re finally retiring, handing over the company to your son-in-law. What are you going to do with all your free time now?”

 

“Not this again,” his father says as he narrows his eyes at him. “You have made it _very_ clear that you want _nothing_ do with the company.”

 

Logan cocks his head and gives a forced smile. “I did… until your son-in-law went and _corrupted_ it.”

 

“May I remind you that it was _your_ idea to invest in the parks,” he says, waving his hand at a servant behind Logan, instructing them where to place a table.

 

“Yes,” Logan says, looking down. “It was my idea to invest in Westworld. In _one_ park, a place where people could go to live out their greatest fantasies. A _fake_ world, dad, but then William turned it into…” He gives a big laugh. “ _Fucking_ Delos Destinations, and it became a _fucking_ marketing scheme,” he lowers his voice. “And not to mention, my _brother-in-law’s_ secret project.” He raises his eyebrows at his father.

 

His father frowns at him, the usual expression he wears when speaking to his only son.

 

“Do people actually _know_ what they’re celebrating here today?” Logan continues. “What William’s take over _actually_ means?” He moves closer to his father so they are only an inch apart. “I wish I’d never invested in the _stupid_ park in the first place. And I hope that you get what’s coming to you. _You_ let this spark ignite, dad, and you’re going to pay.”

 

His father looks on at him, a little intimidated but not frightened. “Logan, I’m tired of always arguing with you.” He holds his hand up to stop Logan from objecting. “And if you keep this up, I’m going to kick you out of the house.”

 

Logan begins to open his mouth, to argue once again, but his dad beats him to it.

 

“But you have no job or money… and I do not want to kick you out onto the street. You are still my son,” he says, his face softening the slightest bit. “But if you don’t stop all of this, I _will_ stick to my word.”

 

Logan presses his lips together to stop the tears that he can feel coming. His father never once believed in him. He never once had _any_ faith in him.

 

“I’d appreciate it if you were out of the way when the guests start arriving,” his father says sternly.

 

“Gladly so,” Logan replies. With that, he turns around and squeezes his eyes shut and clenches his hands into fists.

 

“And by the way,” his father says behind him. “I know the prejudice you have against the parks, but William is providing the entertainment today.”

 

He opens his eyes, which are now bloodshot due to holding the tears in. That means the hosts are the entertainment. William’s sick fascination with them, his delusion that they are actually really people, was not only in the parks, it has bled into his real life too.

 

“I don’t want a scene like last time,” his father says.

 

He glances back towards his father, tears beginning to glisten his eyes at how _fucked_ up this whole thing is. “Of course not.”

 

He walks away from his father and wipes his eyes with the sleeve of his jacket. He won’t let it get to him again, not like the last time he caused a scene. He wishes he’d never gone to the investment meeting about the park in the first place. He wishes he hadn’t been so caught up in the advanced technology of the hosts, of what it could mean for the future of entertainment. He wanted to get ahead of the game, he wanted the Delos name to be world renowned for being the reason places like Westworld existed.

 

But not this. He never wanted this. William took it out of his hands and twisted it into his own _sick_ fantasy. He regrets taking William to Westworld as a welcome to the family. It was supposed to just be a fun little trip for them to bond, a place where they could both let loose. But everything turned to _shit_ after that. And things were never going to be okay again. He may as well drink himself to death like his mother did.

 

He walks past a table full of food and takes a couple of sandwiches and eats them as he makes his way outside. He walks past the staff and with his mouth full and gives them a small smile which in turns disgusts them. Not that he cares, he gave up caring about what his fathers servants thought of him a long time ago.

 

He makes his way to the pool and relaxes into one of the lounge chairs. He lets the sun wash over him and drifts off to sleep.

 

***

 

He hears chattering and squints as he wakes up to the blinding sun. He pushes his sunglasses down to his nose and looks back up at the house. People are gathered and he can hear glasses clinking. The party has begun.

 

He rubs his eyes and looks up at the sky. He’s wary of falling asleep in the sun, because of the time he almost died of heatstroke. But he knows that _this_ is reality, and he’s not trapped in the desert. But right now, he needs to get out of the sun. Being reminded of that dark time still causes him great anxiety.

 

He hangs his legs over the edge of the chair. His head starts thumping and he grunts. “I need a drink,” he says to himself.

 

He waltzes his way over to the house, trying not to make eye contact with anyone. He finds a servant and swipes a drink off a tray. He lingers for a moment because he vaguely recognises her, and then it hits him. She’s one of _them_.

 

He takes a sip of his drink, and then he hears a familiar tune. He moves towards it and the piano comes into view and a blonde woman is sitting at it. He moves around the piano some more and the side of her face comes into view.

 

“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” he mumbles.

 

Was he really stupid enough to bring _her_ here? In clear view of everyone at this _stupid_ party? The host that he fell in _love_ with, who caused him to become delusional and loose his grip on reality.

 

She doesn’t turn, she’s most likely programmed to not associate with the guests. He freezes as he looks farther behind her. His sister, Juliet, and William are standing there, with their daughter, Emily. Seemingly the perfect family, the perfect successors to his father’s business.

 

They’re looking the other way, they haven’t seen him. He begins to walk away so he doesn’t have to speak to them, but his eyes dart back when he sees movement. Juliet and William didn’t see him, but Emily did.

 

He turns and walks fast towards the edge of the yard. His favourite hidden spot, away from everyone else. It has a great view of the city, especially at night. He turns back and sees Emily running on her short little legs after him.

 

“Uncle Logan!” she yells, her arms waving around wildly as she runs.

 

Her familiar, high pitched voice makes him soften. He didn’t want to bring attention to himself, but for his niece he’ll make an exception. He doesn’t ever want to be in one of his bad moods in front of her.

 

He turns around and forces a smile onto his face. Not that he really has to fake it, Emily is the one person in his family who he genuinely loves. The one last piece of innocence in his screwed up family. He wishes there was something he could do to make sure that she does not get corrupted by William too.

 

She runs towards him and throws herself into his arms. He kneels down as he wraps his arms around her and suddenly his worries seem to disappear. She pulls away and looks at him. She has a look of childlike wonder plastered on her face.

 

“My favourite niece,” Logan says, riffling her hair with his hand which she tries to recoil from. “Well, you’re my _only_ niece but even if you weren’t, you’d still be my favourite.” He touches the tip of her nose which cases her to giggle.

 

Emily jumps up and down a few times. “It’s my birthday in three days!” she says, her voice full of excitement.

 

“I know,” he says. He’s envious of her, of how excited she is to grow up, of all that she doesn’t understand yet. Wouldn’t it be great to be able wipe the slate clean?

 

“I’m turning seven,” she says, holding up seven fingers.

 

“You’re almost an adult,” he says teasingly. “I can’t believe how old you’re getting.”

 

In truth, he really couldn’t. Had it really been over seven years since his trip to Westworld with William? Since he almost died in there? He instinctively moves his hand down to his left arm and feels all the lumps underneath his sleeve. Had he really been doing this for that long? He was honestly surprised that he was still alive. He thought he would die before his father. Well, he still could. His father did seem to be quite invincible.

 

Emily is still looking at him intently and it occurs to him that she may have said something else but he didn’t hear. He shakes his head. “Sorry?”

 

“Are you coming to my party?” she says, giving another little jump.

 

He smiles at her warmly. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

 

Emily gives a huge smile, even bigger than before. “I’m very excited!”

 

There was something infectious about her happiness, something he wishes he could have, something he wishes was contagious. Maybe something like that that could save him.

 

“Have you gotten me a present?” she asks expectantly.

 

He scrunches up his face and looks up in thought. “Let me think…” He pauses, stretching out his answer. “Of _course_ I have.”

 

“Can you give me a hint at what it is?” she pleads, standing up tall on her toes.

 

He gives a laugh. “It’s only three days away, kiddo.”

 

She frowns, but only for a second before a smile once again replaces it.

 

Logan looks behind her and suddenly his face falls. Always _him_ , ruining everything good that he has ever had in his life.

 

“Emily,” William says. He’s standing a few metres away, watching, then he begins to walk towards them.

 

Emily turns to her father, and then turns back to Logan and gives him a smile before she runs into her father’s arms. Logan stands up straight, patting the wrinkles out of his clothes. Still, he feels self conscious around his brother-in-law, feeling as though he’s judging him, which he most likely is.

 

“Logan, good to see you here,” William says, giving him a welcoming nod.

 

He presses his lips together to stop himself from lashing out in anger. But he wouldn’t dare at this party, especially not in front of Emily.

 

“You too,” he says, and can’t bring himself to say anything more.

 

William and Emily walk hand in hand back towards the mansion. Logan watches them, anger beginning to boil in his blood. How was it fair that William had all he could ever want in life, after he took everything away from Logan? His sister, his father, the company, the parks, and most notably, William took away Logan’s sanity.


	2. Logan

William's house was even bigger than Logan’s fathers. Although James had only just stood down from the company, William had been a shareholder and partner for years. He had more than enough money to last his family the rest of their lives. But he was greedy, he wanted more. He wanted wealth in another way, in the form of his secret project.

 

Logan knocks on the door and looks through the stained glass window to the side. He sees a little figure getting closer and immediately a smile breaks out on his face.

 

Emily opens the door, her face full of elation, wearing a cute frilly yellow dress. Her hair is clipped back but there are stray hairs flaying wildly.

 

“Here’s the big birthday girl,” he says cheerfully, leaning down to embrace her in a hug.

 

She wraps her arms around him, and then pulls back and looks at his arm that he is holding behind his back. A grin appears on her face. “Do you have my present?”

 

He quickly whips his hand forward, the neatly wrapped gift fitting snugly in the palm of his hand.

 

She looks up to his eyes, her mouth wide open in glee, and then she grabs it out of his hand. She runs and slides to her knees on the wooden floorboards. Logan walks in and closes the door behind him, looking up at the ceiling. It had been a while since he last came to their house. He tried to avoid it, if he could. He usually only visited when William was away on business, or for special occasions like this.

 

He walks over to Emily and looks down at her. The wrapping paper is strewn all over the floor and she is holding the open box and staring at it. She takes the necklace out. A silver elephant on the end of the chain, dotted with little gemstones.

 

Elephants were Emily’s thing at the moment. She has an elephant bedspread, posters all over her room, and countless stuffed animals. He knew something elephant themed would go down well as a gift. And a necklace was something he hoped would not be thrown away when this phase was over. It was something she could keep. To remember him, maybe, if he wasn’t around for much longer.

 

Emily holds up the necklace and turns to him. “Thank you uncle Logan, I love it!” She wraps her arms around him in another hug.

 

He holds out his hand. “Would you like me to put it on?”

 

She nods her head eagerly as she hands him the necklace and turns around. He clasps the necklace in place and pulls her hair out from beneath it.

 

She quickly glances back to him and smiles, and then runs off towards the other kids who are yelling and running around wildly in the backyard.

 

He slowly gathers up the wrapping paper, wanting to delay seeing his brother-in-law for as long as he can. He scrunches it up in his arms and he quietly walks towards the kitchen. William is leaning against the glass door, watching the kids outside. Logan’s sister in the kitchen, preparing the food and getting it all spread out nicely onto platters.

 

When Juliet sees him, she wipes her hands on a tea towel and comes over and gives him a hug. “Emily was so excited that you were coming.”

 

He smiles at that. It was rare for him to feel wanted. “Happy to be here,” he says.

 

She turns back and talks as she gets back to setting all the food out. “How is dad? I’m sorry I haven’t been around lately, life has been hectic.”

 

“Same, same, nothing to report,” he says flatly. Every time he tells people how his dad is, the answer never changes. “He still on all the medication and goes for routine check ups, and the diagnosis is never any different.”

 

“How much longer do they expect until he…?” she says, stopping and looking at him. Juliet was always the one more worried about him. His only daughter, who he treasured.

 

“As long as he continues taking the medication, indefinitely,” he says. “The medication stops it from spreading, but it still cannot be cured. But the doctors said that as long as they prevent it from getting worse, he potentially could survive for a _long_ time.”

 

Juliet wipes her eyes. “That’s good news.”

 

Logan bites his lip and doesn’t reply to that. He’d much rather it if his father was dead. He didn’t care, _let_ the sickness kill him, it wouldn’t change a thing. William runs the company now, his father really had nothing else to live for. Except, it seemed, to make Logan feel worthless.

 

“Do you need any help?” he asks. He’d rather be doing something than let his thoughts consume him. He wanted to avoid getting a fix at his niece’s birthday party, but he brought them just in case he needed to.

 

“No, I’m all good,” she says, concentrating on the food, and then nodding over at her husband. “You could go keep an eye on the kids with William.”

 

He clenches his jaw and wishes that he could get out of this situation. That is the _last_ place we wants to be. But, he doesn’t want to cause a scene, not on Emily’s birthday, and so he doesn’t protest. He doesn’t want to create any drama on her big day.

 

He walks towards William. He clenches his fists and tries to keep his anger intact as he slides up next to him.

 

“Logan, great to see you could make it,” William says, turning towards him and shaking his hand. “I told Emily not to get her hopes up, you are _very_ unreliable sometimes.”

 

Here he goes again, trying to demean him and make him snap and then blame the whole thing on him. But he wasn’t going to give him that satisfaction, not today. “I promised her I’d be here, and I kept that promise,” he says evenly.

 

He gives a sly smile. “And that you did.”

 

They both watch the kids out the window. There is big jumping castle, with cartoon elephants covering it, and other activities going on. About twenty or so kids are out there playing. Logan doesn’t know what else to say, he doesn’t really want to make smalltalk with his brother-in-law.

 

“How’s your father going?” William asks, breaking the silence.

 

Not wanting to repeat what he told his sister, he just simplifies it. “Same, nothing has changed.”

 

“Well, that’s a positive I guess,” William replies, his tone hard to read.

 

“How are the parks?” Logan asks, turning to face him. “Now that you’re the CEO of the company.”

 

“Very well,” he says proudly. “I’ve upped the marketing and advertisement budget, so hopefully by the end of the year we’ll have made at _least_ a fifteen percent increase in profit.”

 

Profit, the only thing he seems to care about. He grunts quietly at that, stifling a laugh, having no comment to that statement.

 

“I’d love for you to come back to the parks one day, to see how they’ve improved since last time,” he continues.

 

He’s testing his patience, it’s obvious that he is. Logan is taken back to that fateful trip when he almost died, and though he tries to keep it in, he ends up snapping. “Have they made it so you can’t get heatstroke now?”

 

William recognises the anger in Logan and decides to back down, even though Logan is sure that his reaction is _exactly_ what he wanted. “I’m sorry I brought it up.”

 

Logan pats the pocket on his jeans and feels the shape of the box. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. _I’m not going to take it at Emily’s birthday party, no matter how much he infuriates me_ , he tells himself. He looks back out at the kids, and notices a few plastic chairs over at the edge of the yard.

 

“I’m going to go watch the kids from over there,” he says, pointing in that direction. He needs to get away from him. He needs to be alone.

 

“Suit yourself,” William says, shrugging as he crosses his arms.

 

Logan walks out into the yard and doesn’t look back. He faintly hears his name being yelled and looks towards the jumping castle.

 

“Uncle Logan!” Emily yells. She’s jumping up and down, waving frantically at him. “Watch this!”

 

He waves at her as she jumps up high with her arms and legs outstretched. He smiles and gives her a thumbs up. So childlike, so innocent. How could William have created someone as pure as her?

 

He sits in one of the plastic chairs and watches the kids running around. He tries to ignore the aching in his body, the nagging to give it what it wants. He taps the box in his pocket with his fingers to distract himself.

 

 

***

 

 

The food is served and the cake is cut, and Logan stays at the back just watching, staying out of the way, only briefly paying attention when Emily occasionally waves at him.

 

He continues focussing his attention on tapping his fingers on the box, but then he notices Emily walking towards him, balancing two plates of cake in her hands. She hands one to him and then climbs into the chair next to him.

 

“I tried to get your attention but you weren’t looking,” she says.

 

He shakes his head. “I’m sorry…”

 

“So I brought you a slice,’’ she says cheerfully, taking a bite of the rich chocolate fudge cake, leaving crumbs on her face. “Sorry you’re feeling left out. But you’re too big to go on the jumping castle, and you’re too old for the kids activities.” She pauses as she takes another bite. “But I’m glad you came.”

 

He’s touched by her words. Despite everything, she actually _wants_ him here. “I’m glad I’m here too kiddo.”

 

They sit there eating their cake, which helps distract him from the nagging in his arm. Emily doesn’t even seem to mind being here with him at the moment and not with her friends.

 

Emily puts her empty plate on her lap and picks up the elephant necklace. “I love this necklace.” She looks up at him. “I can wear it when we go to The Raj.”

 

He thinks he must be dreaming, _surely_ she didn’t just say that did she? He looks at her with a confused look on his face. “What did you say?”

 

She looks up at him with her big brown eyes and lets the necklace fall. His tone obviously shocked her a bit. “Mommy and daddy’s gift for me was a trip to one of the parks. I chose The Raj because they have elephants!”

 

He shakes his head . “Of course you did,” he mumbles. “Emily, those elephants aren’t real, wouldn’t you much rather see a _real_ elephant?”

 

Emily rolls her eyes. “I _know_ they’re not real, I’m not stupid. But daddy said they’re _so_ realistic that you can’t tell the difference… and it’s safer because you can’t get hurt in the parks.” She says all of this in one breath, as though she’s been told this so many times that she has taken it to heart.

 

He takes in a deep breath. Of _course_ her father told her that, of _course_ he did. But Logan can’t let her go. Not to the parks. Not yet. “Emily, are you sure it’s a good idea to go there?”

 

“You don’t want me to go?” Her face falls, and it looks like she’s almost about to cry, but then her expression changes. “I can ask if you can come if you like?” She’s read his concern as jealously.

 

She begins to jump down from the chair but Logan puts his hand firmly on her arm to stop her. “Emily, no I don’t want to go, I…” He can’t continue. This is not a conversation he needs to have with her, it’s a conversation he needs to have with his brother-in-law.

 

“I can ask…” she starts.

 

“No, Emily, it’s fine,” he says, sighing. “I’m sorry… I’m sure you’ll have a great time there.”

 

She gives him a quick hug and then runs back over to her friends.

 

Logan squeezes his eyes shut, unable to keep his feelings in anymore. He was hoping he’d have a at least a few more years until she was exposed to the parks. That he’d be able to figure out a way to shield her from them. But it was already too late. And now his anger towards his brother-in-law was getting stronger.

 

He marches over to the house. The kids are all outside eating, and Juliet is out there keeping an eye on the food. William is once again leaning against the door frame staring out at the kids with a smug smile on his face.

 

Before William has time to realise what’s happening, Logan pushes him inside and around the corner. “What the _fuck?_ She’s a child.”

 

William shakes his head in confusion. “What are you on about?”

 

“Emily told me about your _gift_ to her,” he says, trying to keep his voice even.

 

“Whoa, whoa,” he says, putting his hands up in mercy. “Calm down. We’re going to The Raj, arguably the tamest of the parks. I wouldn’t dream of taking her to Westworld until she’s _much_ older.”

 

“I don’t _care_ if its the tamest park, she’s a _child_ ,” he says through clenched teeth.

 

“People go on family holidays to the parks all the time,” William says calmly. “We’ll stick to the family friendly areas and it will all be fine.” He puts a comforting hand on Logan’s shoulder. “She wants to see the elephants.”

 

“Then take her to a _damn_ zoo!” he snaps, his anger all coming out now.

 

William squints his eyes at him. “She’s excited to go, do you really want to crush that for her?”

 

That stops him. “No,” he says, his voice softening and letting his shoulders relax. He’s torn, he wants to protect her, but he doesn’t want to break her spirit.

 

“I know you had a bad experience in one of the parks…” William starts.

 

“A _bad_ experience?” he says, lowering his voice. That was a _huge_ understatement. “I’m going to bring you down, your secret project, whatever the _fuck_ it is, I’m going to expose it. I’m going to expose you for the _psychopath_ you are.” His body begins shaking with anger.

 

William moves closer to him so their faces are almost touching. “I’d like to see you try. I know you’re too afraid to step foot back in the park.” He pauses as he watches Logan’s expression closely. “ _You_ couldn’t handle it…”

 

Logan’s anger completely takes over and he pushes William aggressively against the wall. “ _You_ did this to me… it’s _your_ fault…”

 

“Logan!” Juliet exclaims.

 

He’s brought back to reality and lets go of his brother-in-law. His breathing is heavy as he turns to his sister.

 

“What…?” she starts, looking on at them. “This is _Emily’s_ party, what are you doing?”

 

“Juliet, I’m sorry…” he says, reaching a hand out to her as an apology, but she recoils from his touch.

 

“I think you should leave,” William says as he straightens up his clothes.

 

“Yes,” Juliet agrees, looking Logan in the eye. “You _promised_ there would be no drama.”

 

“I know, I’m sorry,” Logan says.

 

He felt horrible. He’d promised he wouldn’t cause a scene, and yet that is exactly what he’d done.

 

William walks around and puts a hand around his wife’s waist. “This is a _children’s_ birthday party. We can’t have someone here who might be at risk of endangering them.” He nods his head down at Logan’s arm.

 

He looks down and notices his sleeve has rolled up, exposing the track marks on his arm. He pulls his sleeve down and concedes. “Okay,” he says, sighing. “I’ll leave. Just… tell Emily that I got sick and had to go, I don’t want her to think that I left because I didn’t want to be here.”

 

“Of course, I’ll tell her that,” Juliet says sympathetically.

 

William’s face says otherwise. Logan knows that he’ll probably twist this whole thing and blame it on him, as always. But what could he do? Anything he does just creates more drama, more problems. Maybe his father was right and he was just a _useless_ junkie.

 

He walks past his sister and brother-in-law and leaves the house. Once he gets outside, he stares at the front door, the beautiful, _immaculate_ front door of their _perfect_ house. And he begins to cry.

 

He _can’t_ let William corrupt Emily too. He needed to find a way to expose the secret project, to _ruin_ him. He’d heard William and his father talking about it, and had a basic idea of what they were were doing, but he still was not entirely sure what it was. He was determined to find out, and he was _determined_ to to protect Emily.

 

But then he looks down at his arm and realises how _stupid_ that is. He’s high most of the time, not in his right mindset. What could he possibly do? He had no power in this situation.


	3. Logan

Over the next few years, Logan had figured out exactly what his brother-in-law’s project was. He’d heard whispers and had an idea, but after searching through all of his fathers documents and listening into his business meetings, he’d discovered the whole truth.

 

The details of project didn’t surprise him at all. William had an obsession with the hosts, and now he could potentially become one of them.

 

They were working on transferring human consciousness into hosts, creating a copy of them. One that could not die. One that could stay young and live forever. And the first subject was going to be his father. That was why William couldn’t wait for him to succumb to his sickness.

 

Nine years later, his father was still alive. His sickness hadn’t killed him yet. He was still living with it, if you could call it living. But none the less, he was still breathing. But when he did eventually die, the immortality project was going to revive him.

 

And not only that, but they had been collecting guest data in the parks. Which Logan already knew, but he thought it was just used it to sell them things, to make more of a profit. But it was much more sinister than that.

 

You see, only the most rich and powerful people can afford to go to the parks. They had been collecting their data and potentially could create copies of them.

 

The whole thing sickened Logan. He regretted investing in the park all those years ago. He regretted taking William for a fun ‘welcome to the family’ trip to Westworld. That’s what it was meant to be, a fun harmless trip. But he turned into his own _fucking_ game and now he had all the power.

 

Logan still wanted to protect Emily, but there was nothing much he could do. William always twisted his words and intentions and used them against him. But he still tried as best as could to protect her.

 

William took his family on trips to the parks many times over the years. Not just The Raj, although that was Emily’s favourite, but to all of them. Except for Westworld. And Logan knew exactly the reason why he wouldn’t take his family there. It was where the project was facilitated.

 

Trips to the parks became a regular thing. They’d go twice, maybe three times a year. But it all stopped when Emily went through a rebellious stage at age twelve and refused to go on any more family holidays with her parents. Logan was relieved at that. Her father could still corrupt her in other ways, like her college fund coming from the company’s fortune, but not going to the parks was still something.

 

Now, it had been a month since Logan’s five month stint in rehab. He got better, despite his father not believing he would. But he had begun to feel himself drowning again, falling down a deep hole and unable to escape. But he tried, he really did. Because if he died, he could no longer protect his niece.

 

When things did get bad all of those months ago, he asked his father for help. His father, who had never believed him and thought he was beyond saving, actually agreed to help him. He paid for him to go to the best rehab facility in the country. That gave Logan hope that maybe his father could love him and see the potential in him one day. And so he tried, and he got clean.

 

And he had been for a month, which was momentous in his own way. But when he got out, his father didn’t treat him any differently than before. He treated him the same. A useless, junkie ofson, good for nothing.

 

Despite trying the _best_ that could and promising that he’d stay clean, it was never enough. And Logan realised that what his father saw him as was all he was destined to be.


	4. Logan

Every year, Emily still always wanted to see him on her birthday. As she got older, it stopped being parties, and instead turned into family dinners. She refused to have one if Logan could not come. At least someone wanted him around.

 

Today was her sixteenth birthday. Logan couldn’t believe how much she had grown up, and how into her own she had become. Maybe she was strong enough to take care of herself, maybe she didn’t need him anymore. Maybe she never had. Maybe she was strong enough not to let her father get into her head.

 

He dressed up for the occasion, determined to be on his best behaviour and not let William aggravate him like he tended to do most of the time. This time, even though he’d promised this _every_ single time, he was determined that her birthday was going to be drama free.

 

Logan walks up the front steps and knocks on the door. Emily, wearing a pale yellow dress with her hair down in light curls, answers the door and smiles when she sees him. She had grown into a beautiful young woman, but it makes him little sad that she’s no longer that innocent little girl.

 

“Uncle Logan,” she says, giving a big smile. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

 

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” he says as he hands her his gift.

 

“No, I said I didn’t want anything…” she says, pushing it back towards him.

 

“I know, but after everything I’ve put you through in the last year, see it as an apology.”

 

“I don’t blame you for any of that, you didn’t have too…” she says, but tears begin to fall down her cheeks.

 

He notices the necklace around her neck, the one with the elephant he gave her for her seventh birthday. He smiles. “Open it,” he urges.

 

She carefully unwraps the box and opens it up. Elephant earrings, ones that match her necklace. She looks up at him. “They’re beautiful.”

 

“You don’t even have to wear them… I walked past them and it reminded me of that necklace, and I had to get them for you.” He pauses as his eyes focus on the necklace. “I didn’t know you still wore it.”

 

She nervously begins fiddling with the chain. “I wore it everyday while you were in rehab.”

 

Logan is touched, but then expression suddenly changes as William walks up behind her. She looks over his daughter’s shoulder at the earrings, and then he looks up at Logan. “What a thoughtful gift.”

 

Emily shrugs away from her father, leaving the two of them alone.

 

“Good to see you, Logan,” William says, holding out his hand. “Congratulations on making it through rehab.”

 

His heart catches in his chest and he wants to lash out at him and his entitled _demeaning_ tone he always uses when talking to him. But he doesn’t, he holds it in and shakes his hand. “Thank you,” he says, in the most genuine way he possibly can.

 

“Come in,” William says, inviting him inside and closing the door behind him.

 

They walk awkwardly together to the dining room. “My father is very ill at the moment, sorry he can’t make it,” Logan says.

 

William smiles that pathetic smug smile. “I’d heard. So he’s not getting any better?”

 

He shakes his head. “I’m afraid not. When I got back he seemed even worse. And he’s been very forgetful about taking his meds.”

 

“Well, he’s going to die one way or another,” William says, not an ounce of sadness or sympathy in his voice. “I guess he has control over when he goes.”

 

Logan stops in tracks. He knows exactly what he’s getting at. His father is going to be the first subject, but he can’t let on that he knows.

 

The dinner goes by without any major hitches. There are other family members, uncles, aunts, cousins, from William’s and the Delos’ side. A real family affair. Throughout the dinner, Emily is very quiet, which is unusual for her. She didn’t seem particularly pleased about this occasion. No doubt her parents set it up without really asking her what she wanted.

 

His sister, Juliet, makes her way through quite a few glasses of wine throughout the night. She’s always loved her wine, so he wasn’t too worried. She is very loud and speaks her mind, which again, is not out of the ordinary. He and Emily make eye contact a lot, silently conveying their thoughts to each other.

 

After they’ve finished eating, Logan retreats to one the lounge rooms. He doubts anyone will notice he’s gone, no one ever does. He’s not the social type. He busies himself with a random book he finds lying around, trying to distract himself from the nagging in his body. He’s tried to avoid it, he promised his father he would stay clean. He was determined not to relapse. For some reason, he wanted validation from his father at least once in his life. But he could already feel himself being pulled into that tide again.

 

The glass door slides opens slightly and Emily sneaks in, quietly closing the door behind her.

 

He closes the book he was holding. “How’s the company?” he says sarcastically, knowing that she feels the same way as him about the conversations they’re having.

 

“So much for my birthday dinner,” she says, rolling her eyes. She collapses down next to him on the couch. “No one even paid _any_ attention to me, except when talking about which _college_ I’m going to, and how I’ll take over the _company_ when I’m older…” She pauses and sighs. “They didn’t even notice when I left.”

 

“Well,” Logan says, grinning. “You get to hang out with me instead.”

 

That gets her to smile. “This is where I’d much rather be.” She begins fiddling with her necklace. “I’m really glad you got clean. And… if you ever feel that you’re going to relapse you can always contact me, or mom, okay? Just know that we’re always here for you.”

 

He’s genuinely touched by her words. But still, that doesn’t get rid of the nagging itchiness on his arm. “Thank you, Emily.” He puts his arm around her. “So what’s been going on with you? It’s been almost a year since I last saw you.”

 

She shrugs, suddenly becoming quiet again. “Nothing much.”

 

She doesn’t seem keen to elaborate on that, so he changes the subject. “Did you get any good gifts for your birthday? I mean, aside from mine which is _obviously_ the best.” He puts on his cocky asshole voice, one that he’d never seemed to outgrow. The one that seems to define him at this point.

 

That gets a small smile out of her, but then her face falls and she looks down. “I’m a horrible daughter.”

 

His first thought is that it has something to do with William, and he immediately gets angry. “What happened?”

 

She looks up at him with a tear stained face. “Mom… she gave me this beautiful jewellery box, with a twirling ballerina that plays music when you open it… and it had my name engraved on the bottom and… I threw it out.” She struggles to keep her tears in. “I was just in a really _weird_ mood this morning and got mad because she’s always drunk and I stopped _dancing_ years ago which she should have known… and so I threw it in the trash.”

 

He puts a comforting hand on her back. “Emily…”

 

“But I felt horrible all day at school, and when I got home I went to retrieve it,” she continues. “But the trash had already been taken out. It was gone.”

 

He’s thankful that it has nothing to do with William, but this is obviously something that is eating her up. He rubs her shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. Apologise to her, she’ll understand.”

 

“She _hates_ me,” she says as her voice erupts in sobs. “I’m a _horrible_ daughter.”

 

He just sits with her while she cries, letting her get all her guilt and anger out. He doesn’t have any words to say, he’s never been good with this kind of thing.

 

She wipes her eyes after her sobs have begun to calm down. “And do you know what dad’s birthday gift for me is? A trip to one of the parks, with _him_.” She croaks out a laugh.

 

He freezes. “Which park did you choose?”

 

She shakes her head. “It’s been four years since I last went to one of them, and I said I didn’t want to go, not unless we could go to Westworld. But he says it’s _too dangerous_.” She puts up quotation marks with her fingers as she says that. “I thought Shogun World was the most dangerous, and I first went there when I was nine. Why will he not let me go to Westworld?”

 

Without thinking, Logan replies. “He doesn’t want you to find out about the project.”

 

That immediately perks her interest and her expression completely changes. “Project? What project?”

 

He shakes his head and begins to stand up. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

 

“No, Logan,” she says, grabbing his arm and pulling him back. “Does this have something to do with when you went to Westworld with dad? He said you haven’t been back to any of the parks since then.” She suddenly gets an idea. “Since I’m underage I need a parental guardian to come with me, but I could ask if you could come instead?”

 

“No, it’s nothing to do with that. I… I can’t go back there.”

 

“What happened on that trip?” she asks pleadingly. She’d stopped crying and instead had a determined look on her face. “Something _must_ have happened because you’re obviously screwed up.” She pauses, realising that didn’t come out right. “I mean, with the drugs and rehab and stuff…”

 

He closes his eyes, not wanting to talk about it, but on the other hand wanting to confide in _someone_. He hasn’t told anyone about that trip, he’s bottled it all up inside. His father blamed him for getting lost in there, for almost dying of heatstroke. He was too afraid to tell anyone what really happened. He was afraid of William and what he was capable of.

 

“Or… you can tell me about the project?” she says, dragging it out as she shrugs. “Your choice. But I’m not letting you leave until you’ve told me something.”

 

He lounges back and puts his head into his hands, running through everything. He hasn’t had anyone to confide in, but he has always been close to Emily. And maybe she could help him. “Your father… I took him to Westworld, as a bonding experience…. it was soon after we’d invested in it."

 

“Right before he married mom, right?” she says.

 

“Yes.” He sits up and looks at her. He needs to tell this story right, tell it truthfully. “I took him there so he could let loose, and have one last bit of fun before he’s tied down in marriage,” he says, taking a deep breath. “A time for us to bond. See, I was an a seasoned guest at the park, I’d been there _many_ times and knew the ins and outs and fun little things to do. I treated the park as it was meant to be treated, a place to do whatever the _fuck_ you wanted with no consequences.” He shrugs. “It’s what all the rich kids did.” He picks up his glass and takes a big sip.

 

“That’s the whole point of the parks right?” Emily says. “Just a fun amusement park where you can do whatever you want and not get hurt?”

 

He nods as he swallows his drink. She understands, she gets it. “Exactly, that is what the parks are. A place where you’re free to become whoever you want to be. Your father was such a withdrawn, little _wimp,_ but he had a good heart, I could see why Juliet fell in love with him.” He remembers back to then, how he believed that all William needed was a little push. He looked at William with such fondness back then. “He was so quiet all the time, and I wanted to try to get him to open up. I genuinely wanted to get to know him better. I wanted us to be like brothers.”

 

“And did he let loose?” she asks.

 

Logan raises his eyebrows.“Oh, yes, he did. But not in the way I expected.” He takes another sip. “The parks are a game, see, they’re not real. But William, he took things _way_ too seriously, he lost touch with reality. He fell in love with a _fucking_ host!” He glances at the sightly ajar door, hoping no one else can hear them.

 

“He fell in love with one of them?” she asks, surprised.

 

He nods cockily. “He was about to marry my sister, and here he was, planning to run away with one of _them_.”

 

Emily leans back. “Wow…” she breathes.

 

He looks on at his niece, worried about telling her too much, but wanting her to understand his side of things. “Do you remember at my father’s retirement party, the woman playing the piano?”

 

Her eyes widen. “That was her? I told her she was pretty… he pranced her around in front of mom.” She shakes her head.

 

“He completely lost it in there,” he continues. He’s kept all this in for so long and just wanted to get it all out. “He let me get captured while he ran off with her. And then when I found him again, I tried to get him back into reality. I cut her open, showed him that she’s just a machine…” He wonders if this is too much. He’s not completely innocent in all of this, he did some bad things in the park. “And I showed him a picture of Juliet, but he was still lost. He slaughtered the hosts were were traveling with and then tied me up and sent me off naked on a horse.”

 

She shakes her head in disbelief. “He what?”

 

He suddenly starts bubbling with anger. “I was alone and lost, and this whole _stupid_ trip was meant to be fun but he _completely_ lost it and left me to die. I could tell that he didn’t care what happened to me.” He pauses to get his anger under control. “You know, do whatever the _fuck_ you want to the hosts, but I was his soon to be brother-in-law, I was human, I was _re_ al, and he did that to me. He left me to die. He showed his true colours in there.” He takes a giant swig of drink, polishing off the glass. It’s the least he needs after reliving all of this.

 

“But… I thought you couldn’t die in the parks?” she says.

 

He gives a quiet laugh. “The bullets can’t kill you, neither can the knives or any of the weapons. But you _sure_ can die of heatstroke.”

 

“How did you get out of there?”

 

“I was alone, in the middle of the desert, in the burning hot sun.” he says. “It was a part of the park that was completely abandoned. I was stuck there for… I don’t even know how long, maybe a week? I could feel the sun burning my skin, I could feel my skin starting to peel off. I had no water or food, the horse was dead. I began having hallucinations. I was convinced I was going to die out there.”

 

Emily is looking on at him, with both intrigue and pain on her face.

 

“But then I saw someone coming towards me. I thought it was another hallucination at first, but it was a host, from the Ghost Nation. He knew I was a guest, and he knew that someone would eventually find me.” He pauses, back in thought. The memories of that time are hazy. “He gave me water and wrapped a blanket around me. Without him I’m sure I would have died. Eventually, I was found. See, this was back in the early days, before all the guests had trackers.”

 

“Well shit,” she breathes. “But… you said you were dehydrated and hallucinating…”

 

“You don’t believe me?” he says as his face falls. It’s a lot to take in, he knows. And really, it does sound like a made up story.

 

“No,” Emily says. “I… I do.”

 

He sighs. He can’t expect her to believe everything he says. “My father paid a _lot_ of money for them to fix me up, and I’m good as new right?” He gives an unsettling laugh. “On the outside maybe, but on the inside…”

 

Emily wraps her arms around him tightly. “I’m so sorry, I had no idea…”

 

“No, Emily, none of this is your fault.”

 

“That’s why dad took over the company and not you? You didn’t want anything to do with it after that?”

 

“Yes.” He reaches for his glass, but realises it’s empty.

 

She looks at him determinedly. “Now that you’ve told me that, can you tell me about the project?”

 

He shakes his head. “All you need to know is that I want it to be shut down.”

 

“Then lets go to the park together and shut it down,” she says, grabbing firmly onto his arm. “Tell me what it is, please.”

 

“I can’t…” he starts, but his head starts throbbing. “I….” He pulls a scrunched up piece of paper out of his pocket and hands it to Emily.

 

She takes it and has a look at it. “A map?” she asks, looking up at him.

 

“Of Westworld. I had a look at some of my fathers documents and drew a very _bad_ version of it.” He gives a laugh. His artistic skills are pretty terrible. He leans over and explains. “I’ve put in some major landmarks, and some places where I think the facility may be located.”

 

She seems a little confused. “So, this project is facilitated in Westworld? That’s why he doesn’t want me going there?” She shakes her head, and runs her finger over the map. “What is the project anyway?”

 

He bites his tongue. He can’t tell her too much, she is still so young with so much life ahead of her, he doesn’t want to freak her out. “They’ve… been collecting data on the guests and storing it there.”

 

She looks up and presses her lips together. “Honestly, that doesn’t surprise me. But what are they doing with the data?”

 

Logan hesitates and decides to not tell her anymore than that. “That’s all I know,” he says convincingly.

 

She doesn’t question him further and seems to believe him. She looks closely at the map. “So, where do you think the project located?”

 

“Well,” he says, leaning over. “I used my knowledge of the park from when I used to go there, so it may be a little inaccurate. But see these little triangles?” He points to each one with his finger. “I think it must be one of them.”

 

She looks up at him. “We can go to Westworld together and find it. Expose whatever this project is.”

 

He looks on at her sadly. That’s a promising prospect, but it’s not possible. “Emily, I can’t go back to the park.”

 

“I’ll be with you, I’ll make sure _nothing_ bad happens,” she says. “I promise.”

 

“I can’t go back,” he says, his voice now strained. He can’t. Not after everything that happened there. “But you can. When you’re eighteen, you’re allowed to go to the parks alone.”

 

“That’s still two more years!” she exclaims. She folds up the map carefully. “You _said_ you wanted to shut it down, don’t you want to do this sooner?”

 

He shakes his head, and puts his hand over hers with the map in it. “You keep the map, and one day, you can go find it yourself. I may not be around much longer…”

 

Her eyes widen. “What do you mean?”

 

“Never mind,” he says, brushing it off. “But if anyone is going to expose the project, it’s going to be _you_.” He takes the map back and unfolds it. He traces around the edge of the map. “All the parks are connected, and it _is_ possible to cross the borders. It’s not easy, but it’s possible.” He pauses. “If you want to avoid your father being able to find you, you could always start in another park and cross the border. They only have records of people in each particular park. If you cross over into another, it will be much harder to locate you.”

 

“Logan,” she says. She looks overwhelmed. He understands that this is a lot to take in, this burden that he is sharing with her. He’s glad that he didn’t tell her the whole truth, that would have been too much.

 

“I know this is a lot to ask of you,” he says, folding the map back up and handing it back to her.

 

“No,” she says, wiping away tears with her arm. “No, I _want_ to do this.”

 

He closes his eyes and leans his head back. After all these years of wanting to do something, now there may actually may be some hope. One day he is hopeful that his brother-in-law will be exposed and the parks will be closed forever.


	5. Logan

Logan tried. He _really_ did. But his father was still plagued by his sickness and his attitude towards his only son had not changed in the slightest. Even though he was clean, his father still treated him as though he was an addict.

 

And so he eventually lived up to that and relapsed. He had no job, no friends, and not much of a life. His father gave him money from the company, the company that he so _very_ despised, just enough for him to get by. He was allowed to live at home as long as he stayed clean, and he tried to obey that. He tried, but nothing got better and he found himself dependant on drugs again.

 

His father found out and kicked him out of the house. He asked for help again, one last time, but his father wouldn’t have any of it. He had told him that it wouldn’t last and he was right, it didn’t. He kicked him out with no money, only a few possessions and his car.

 

Logan had been living in his car for a couple of weeks now. Sleeping in random parking lots, living off protein bars and heroin. He was lost. So completely lost.

 

He was reminded of when his father taught him how to swim. Throwing him into the water, forcing him to swim even though he didn't know how. It was traumatising, he was convinced he was going to drown. That’s how he felt now.

 

He could feel the water puling him down, further and further. He could see the bottom. He told his father, but he still showed no sympathy towards him. He tried to explain it, but how do you put it into words? It’s something you need to see, to experience yourself. And his father didn’t understand.


	6. Emily

Emily had been thinking a lot about what Logan had told her. She believed him about the project, but the other things, she found hard to believe.

 

What he said was so farfetched, and she could not believe that her father would do that to him. It was impossible for her to wrap her head around. Her father was a professional business man, she couldn’t imagine him the way that Logan described him. But this project, she believed that and wanted to help shut it down.

 

Logan said they were collecting guests data, but what for? To sell them products, she assumed. She has some questions and wanted to discuss them with him, but she could not get onto him. So she decided to stop by her grandfathers house after school one day.

 

Emily walks up the front steps, the steps that were so familiar to her as a child, and knocks on the door. She hears some coughs from inside and then the door opens.

 

“Emily,” her grandfather says, forcing a smile. “What a pleasant surprise.”

 

“Hi granddad,” she says, smiling, embracing him in a hug.

 

He coughs a few times, obviously very ill. “I’m sorry I missed your birthday dinner.”

 

She smiles. “That’s okay. Thank you for the lovely gift.” She pauses and looks around him, hoping to see Logan pop out at any second.

 

“I was wondering if Logan was home?” she says.

 

Her grandfather’s expression suddenly goes cold. “He doesn’t live here anymore.”

 

She looks at him in confusion. “What?”

 

“He no longer lives here, moved out a couple of weeks ago,” he says coldly.

 

That doesn’t make any sense to her. “But he had nowhere else to go.”

 

“I told him he was welcome here as long as he stayed clean,” he says.

 

“He relapsed,” she says, her face falling. “He needs help, he needs to go back to rehab.”

 

“He got help, he went to rehab, and he’s _still_ a junkie.” His posture stiffens as he begins to close the door.

 

“Well, he needs _more_ help,” she says sternly as she pushes the door back open. “Granddad, you can’t just kick him out. Where is he?”

 

He coughs and splutters some more. “Don’t know, don’t care.”

 

She tries to pulls the door back but it’s already been slammed in her face. She stands there, stunned, scared and worried for her uncle.

 

When she gets home she ignores her father sitting at the dining table bench and goes straight to her mother. She’s on the couch in the lounge room, a glass of red wine in her hand.

 

“Mom,” she says. “I went by granddads house to see Logan, but he said he kicked him out.”

 

Her head snaps around. “What?”

 

“Mom, Logan needs help, he doesn’t have a job, he doesn’t have any money,” she says, collapsing down onto the couch next to her. “Do you have _any_ way to contact him? You were always close, and I’m really worried about him.”

 

She looks at her daughter, putting the glass down. A frown appears on her face and she hugs Emily.

 

“He relapsed,” her father says from the doorway.

 

Emily pulls away from her mother and looks at him. “Yes, he did. And he needs help.”

 

“He got help,” her father says, walking into the room.

 

Emily suddenly gets mad and stands up. “He needs _more_ help.” She looks at her father. Could any of what Logan said possibly be true? In a moment of anger, she snaps at him. “He told me what happened when he took you to Westworld.” She wants to see how he reacts to that.

 

“Oh did he?” he says, raising his eyebrows. “I wouldn’t trust _anything_ he says, he was high on that trip.”

 

That surprises her. “No… he only started using _after_ that trip…”

 

“ _No_ , he was using back then,” he says.

 

“You’re lying…” she stutters. “No… mom, this isn’t true is it?”

 

She puts her glass down. “I’m afraid it is, honey. Logan has always had issues.”

 

Emily shakes her head, trying to process all of this. Was everything he told her a lie? How would he even know if his mind was clouded back then? Emily didn’t know what to believe.

 

“I’m sorry, Emily,” his father says, placing a hand on her shoulder. “I tired to warn you about him, I’ve always tried to protect you from him.”

 

It was all so confusing. How could she believe anything that Logan has told her now? “So you’re just going to _leave_ him out on the streets?”

 

“Emily,” he says. “There’s nothing we can do, his self destructive behaviour…”

 

“So you’re not even going to _try_?” she says incredulously. He may have issues, but he was still family. “Unbelievable.”

 

Emily stomps up to her room and slams the door loudly. She leans against it and cries. The things Logan said may not be completely true, but he is still her uncle and she wanted to help him.

 

She goes over to her desk and finds the map that he gave her. Despite what her father just told her, she still believes what he said about the project.

 

She flattens out the map and rips a blank piece of paper out of a notebook. She writes some notes, of all that she knows about the project. Then there is a soft knock on her door.

 

“Leave me alone,” she says loudly, focussing on the map.

 

“Emily…” her mother’s voice wafts through the door. It sounds sad and sympathetic, and so Emily concedes.

 

When she opens the door, her mother hands her a post it note with an address written on it. Her face softens as she realises what it is. “Is he okay?”

 

She nods. “He didn’t sound great, but at least we know he’s alive.” She pauses. “He’s living in his car, at a different parking lot each night.”

 

“This is where he is now?” she asks as she reads the address.

 

Her mother takes her hand and squeezes it. “If you hurry and get the bus, you can go see him now.”

 

She hugs her mother. “Thank you, mom.” Her voice begins to break a bit. “I’m just… really worried about him. Granddad… it didn’t seem like he was in his right mind, kicking his son out like that.”

 

Her eyes soften. “Oh, honey, granddad hasn’t been in his right mind for a _very_ long time.”

 

Emily gathers some things and heads for the bus stop. She doesn’t know what to expect when she sees her uncle, but she hopes that she can get through to him. Maybe if they come up with a plan, that will give him incentive to want to live.


	7. Logan

Logan’s plan was to stay in his car, his only sustenance the drugs. Eventually, he’d probably starve to death or something. He didn’t care. He’d given up caring. No one cared about him, so why should he care about himself?

 

But his sister called, and said that his niece was worried about him. And he felt guilty, that he was planning to let himself die without saying goodbye to her. And so he puckered up and decided to stay strong, just long enough to see her. To say goodbye.

 

Logan watches as the bus rolls up to the bus stop at the edge of the parking lot. A wave of people hop off, and he sees his niece. She immediately recognises his car and walks fast towards it.

 

She gets in the passenger side and throws a backpack onto the back seat. He raises his eyebrows at it.

 

“Supplies,” she says. “Food, blankets, and other things, so that you won’t die out here.”

 

He’s touched by that, but still, it won’t change his mind. “Thank you, Emily.” He ruffles her hair, the way he used to do when she was a kid. She recoils slightly, but has a smile on her face.

 

She looks around at the car, noticing a strange smell. “I’m sure mom would be more than happy to let you stay at our house.”

 

“Thanks for the offer,” he says. “But I’m not staying in a house with your father.”

 

She figured as much but thought she’d try. “I can pay for a hotel? I don’t understand why your dad…”

 

“I relapsed,” he snaps. He didn't mean to scare her, but her expression shows that he did. “That was our deal, I could live there as long as I was clean.” He gives an unsettling laugh. “Well, to _no ones_ surprise, I’m not clean anymore.”

 

Emily notices his exposed arm, his sleeve pushed all the way up. Marks line his arms and the veins are very noticeable. “You need help. I can pay for you to go back to rehab. I’m sure mom…”

 

“What _use_ will that be?” He turns sharply to her. “I relapsed. I’m useless, I’m a failure, I’m a _fucking_ junkie, just as my father always said. Nobody wants me around. No one cares about me.”

 

“That’s not true,” she says quietly. “Mom cares, _I_ care. Do we mean _nothing_ to you?”

 

That feels like a punch in the stomach to him. Of _course_ they mean something to him. “Emily, no…. I’m beyond saving, that’s all, you need to let me go. I’m already drowning, it’s only a matter of time before the bottom _smacks_ me right in the face.” He grabs his beer bottle and puts it up to his mouth.

 

Emily grabs it and stops him. “No,” she says sternly. “I _won’t_ let you die.”

 

His eyes begin to water. “You know, you’re the only friend I have, the only friend I’ve ever had.”

 

“We’re not friends,” she says, snatching the bottle off him. “We’re _family_.”

 

He’s touched by her words, but still, it doesn’t change his view. “Tell that to my father,” he mumbles.

 

“ _Fuck_ him,” she says. “ _Fuck_ them all. Let’s expose the project together.”

 

He shakes his head. “You know I can’t go back there,” he says, the drugs starting to take effect, causing him to slur his words.

 

“What, so you’d rather stay here and live in your car?” she asks. “Logan, what else do you have to lose?”

 

He looks at her. She’s right, he has nothing more to lose, he’s already lost everything. But the thought of going back to the park causes him great anxiety, beginning in his chest and going all they way up his body. He’s drowning in those thoughts. It’s too much.

 

Emily notices the way he looks. “Okay, I’m sorry, I know it’s a scary thought going back, but I’ll be with you the _whole_ time.” She pauses. “Dad said that you…” she starts, but trails off. “We can go _together_.”

 

“No, Emily, I’m sorry but I can’t,” he says. “I’d rather be _dead_ than go back to that _fucking_ park.”

 

She pulls back and realises it’s no use, he won’t budge. She pulls out the hand drawn map of the park that he gave her. “Okay… can I ask you a few questions about the project then? Why do you think they’re they gathering guests data?” She pulls out a list of things she’d written. Questions and speculations regarding the project. “To blackmail them?”

 

Logan holds back. He doesn’t want to tell her the whole truth. Blackmail was part of it, but it was _much_ bigger than that. “Something like that, possibly.”

 

“How do they gather the data?” she asks, a determined look on her face. “Are there secret scanners or cameras or something?”

 

He honestly does not know much, but he does know one thing. “When guests interact with hosts, those hosts collect data on them.”

 

“Ahhh,” she says. “That makes sense.” She writes some things down on the paper. “So when I go to the parks, best to keep how much I share with the hosts to a minimum I guess.”

 

He nods, and then gets a cheeky smile on his face. “Especially, when you’re old enough to go to the pleasure houses.” He laughs. “Oh the things I did in there, I can’t even imagine what kind of _shit_ they have on me.”

 

Emily gives a small awkward laugh. “So, they can use that… information…” She cringes at the thought. “To advertise products to you, try to get you to buy them? So they can profit off of you?” Her voice begins to sound more confident as she starts to piece more things together. “Especially because the people who go to the parks are _very_ wealthy.”

 

What she’s saying makes a lot of sense. And she’s half right. There is more, but he doesn’t want to freak her out too much. She went to the park many times as a child, and the thought of how much data on her they must have is disturbing.

 

“Logan,” she says. “I’m going to do this. I’m going to expose this research project, I _promise_.”

 

Logan’s eyes begin to water at the possibility of that.

 

She frowns. “I can’t do it for another few years, but I _promise_ you that I’ll do it. I’ll expose what they're doing. It’s not right, spying on people like that.” She grips firmly onto his shoulder.

 

“Close the parks forever,” he mumbles to himself, too quiet for her to hear. Ever since William was groomed to take over the company, that is all he’s wanted. He _hates_ those parks. He _hates_ what he turned them into.

 

They’re both silent for a few moments as they imagine that possibility, and what it could mean, how it would change everything. But Logan knows deep down that he’s not going to be around to see it.

 

He opens the door and gets out of the car. He breathes in some fresh air and his lungs thank him after being cooped up in there all day. Emily comes out and joins him.

 

“You should probably head home,” he says.

 

She nods. “I’ll come up with a plan. I’ll figure out a way to do this.”

 

“I believe you, kiddo,” he says, ruffling her hair. “Sorry, you’re not a kid anymore, are you?”

 

She shakes her head and smiles, then gestures towards his car. “You’ve got a ton of food in there, and blankets, so promise me you won’t starve or freeze, okay?”

 

He presses his lips together, but nods in agreement to that. About other things… he doesn’t promise anything.

 

His niece embraces him in a hug. It’s nice and warm, and it feels good to be wanted. To have someone who cares. “I love you, uncle Logan,” she says into his ear.

 

When she pulls away, she looks at him with a tear stained face. But there is hope in her eyes. She really believes she can do this. And he has faith in her too.

 

He watches Emily walk away towards the bus stop, knowing in his heart that this is the last time he is ever going to see her.


	8. Emily

Emily had hoped that her visit with Logan had worked. She promised him that she’d bring the parks down and hoped that he would want to stay around to see that. She gave him food so he wouldn’t starve, and blankets so he wouldn’t freeze. And she told him how much she cared about him. She thought it was enough. She thought she could save him. But unfortunately, she couldn’t.

 

She tried to contact him again but she couldn’t. And neither could her mom. He was missing, no one knew where he was. He was nowhere to be found. Until one day, when her mom got a call from her grandfather. A body had been found in a blue Mercedes, in a parking lot on the other side of town. The body had been formally identified as Logan.

 

It was less than six months after her last conversation with Logan that he overdosed. She was distraught. She felt alone. There was no one she could confide in anymore about the project. She was all alone in that now.

 

Emily felt disgusted at his funeral. All these people, her grandfathers rich friends and her fathers business partners, no one here actually knew Logan. They all pretended to cry and acted as though they were sad about his death. But Emily knew they weren’t.

 

Logan’s father didn’t even come. His state had begun to deteriorate even more after the death of his only son. The doctors said that grief could do that.

 

Emily held her mothers hand throughout the whole ceremony, the two of them seemingly the only people who truly cared about Logan. She glanced over at her dad a few times, and he seemed to show no emotion.

 

After the ceremony, there were food and drinks. Her mother had always liked to have a drink, but she’d noticed it get exceptionally worse since Logan’s death.

 

Her mother reaches for another drink, her fifth of the day, but Emily tries take it from her.

 

“I think you’ve had enough,” she says to her mother.

 

Her mother doesn’t let go of her grip on the glass. “I’m at my brothers funeral and my father is on his death bed, I think I _deserve_ this.”

 

She lets it go, because she understands. “Fine, as long as I can have one too.”

 

Emily goes over to a waiter. She grabs a glass of wine and takes a sip. It’s not that she hasn’t had alcohol before, but her mother had always tried to persuade her. But today, she doesn’t.

 

She takes a look at the waiter. It wouldn’t surprise her if he’s a host, her father did organise this funeral after all. She goes back over to her mother and finds her father there too. He looks on disapprovingly at the drink in her hand.

 

“Emily,” her father says, narrowing his eyes.

 

“What?” she says sarcastically, taking a sip of wine just to spite him. “I’m in mourning, let me have this, dad.” She makes eye contact with her mother, who gives her a small smile.

 

“He had it coming,” he says coldly. “I knew he’d overdose sooner or later.”

 

That angers her. “And whose fault is that?” she snaps, making direct eye contact with him.

 

He narrows his eyes at her. “What are you implying?”

 

She shakes her head and takes another sip. “Nothing, dad. Just forget it.” She turns and walks off.

 

“Don’t you speak to me like that,” her father says behind her.

 

She ignores him and continues walking. Things were already bad, they couldn’t get any worse. She was more determined than ever to keep her promise to Logan, but so frustrated that she still had to wait a few years until she could.

 

Her father comes and finds her soon after. Emily isn’t in the mood to talk to him, but she’s also not in the mood to move.

 

“Emily,” he says, taking a seat next to her. “I’m sorry if what I said seemed insensitive, I know you loved your uncle.”

 

“And I know you didn’t,” she retorts harshly.

 

He sighs. “Emily, you know that Logan had issues.”

 

“He told me what happened in the park,” she says. “He told me _everything_. He told me what you did to him.”

 

He looks at her closely. “And do you believe him?”

 

“I…” she stutters, not sure how to answer. She still wasn’t entirely sure how she felt about the whole thing. “I don’t know.”

 

“Emily, you need to understand this. He was on drugs on that trip, which caused him to be impulsive and brash. It was my first trip to the park and I didn’t want to do anything dangerous, so he went off on his own, and yes, he did get lost in the park.”

 

Emily sits there still, trying to figure out what the truth is.

 

“When he was eventually found, he was severely dehydrated,” he continues. “He had heatstroke, and that can cause you to be delusional, to see things that aren’t real. It can make you believe that people are out to hurt you, when really they’re not.”

 

She sits up, listening intently. “All the things he said you did, that was because his memories are all screwed up?”

 

Her father nods. “You didn’t see him after that, he didn’t know where he was or who anyone was. His memories of that trip were very muddled.”

 

“So you didn’t turn against him? You weren’t out to get him?” she asks, trying to make rational sense of everything.

 

“No, but he had convinced himself that I was. It was the illness that made him believe those things. He hasn’t been the same since that trip.”

 

What her father is saying makes a lot of sense. This whole time Logan has been very ill and not in his right mind. The heatstroke altered his memories of that trip. He was mistaken, lost in his thoughts. She loved her uncle, she did. But maybe her father was right, Logan was just very sick. He didn’t know to process all the confusion surrounding that trip and so he used drugs to try to escape from it.

 

“I’m not happy that he died,” he continues. “It’s tragic, really. I’m sorry if it seemed as though I didn’t care.”

 

Emily softens. “No, dad, I’m sorry that I even believed that you could have done those things.” She hugs her father tightly.

 

“I love you, Emily,” he says in her ear. “You know that right? All I have ever wanted is to keep you safe.”

 

She pulls away and nods. “I know that.” And she genuinely means it. “We need… we need to look out for mom, both of us need to make sure to be there for her. I’m worried about her drinking… especially after the death of her brother.”

 

Her father puts a comforting hand on her arm. “I know. I’ll be there for her no matter what, I promise.”

 

She nods as she snuggles her head into her fathers side, the way she used to do when she was a kid.

 

Her grandfather died only a few months after Logan. His medication stopped working, or he stopped taking it, no one really knows. His funeral was much bigger, much more important. But she didn’t feel sad, not really. He’d been sick all her life and she was prepared for it. But it was still hard, losing two family members in a short period of time.


	9. Emily

Emily and her father became closer than ever over the next few years. They both stuck together to look out for her mother. They tried to persuade her from drinking, by distracting her and doing things together as a family.

 

She began to realise that the parks were not so bad. Not as bad as Logan had made them out to be. Her father explained to her about all the new security that had been implemented, and how safe everything was. She was proud of all that her father had done, she truly was. She still had no desire to go back there though. The parks were her fathers thing, she didn’t want to get in the way of his work.

 

Years later, when Emily turned eighteen, she eventually did decide to go back to one of the parks. Despite knowing that Logan was very ill when he died, she still believed him about the research project, and she wanted to keep her promise to him.

 

She could finally go to the parks unsupervised. She told her father she was going, and he was happy to let her go. Their relationship was very strong and he trusted her.

 

She told him that she was going to The Raj, but that was a lie. When she got there, she headed to Westworld. She knew that her father wouldn’t let her go if she’d told him. She felt bad about lying, after how close they had become, but she had made a promise to her uncle that she wanted to keep.

 

She followed Logan’s hand drawn map as best as she could. But the park was so big and unfamiliar that she got a bit lost. It was scary being alone, she’d only ever been to the other parks with her parents.

 

But then she did end up stumbling across something that she was searching for, the Ghost Nation. She saw them from a distance, their prominent clothing and paint covered bodies. She remembered what Logan told her about them, that one of them was kind to him. But still, all the information on the park said that they were savages, one of the most feared groups of people in the park.

 

Emily nervously approaches them. She puts the map in her pocket and puts her hands up in surrender.

 

“I mean no harm,” she says in Lakota. She briefly learnt about the Native American’s in school and knew a little of their language.

 

One of the warriors warily approaches her. He has long straight back hair and white face paint on his body, with red handprints covering him. He says something that she does not understand.

 

“I’m sorry, I don’t know your language very well,” she says, her hands still up.

 

The Ghost Nation warrior looks her up and down and turns around. “Follow me,” he says in English.

 

Emily is surprised by how easy that was. As she follows him, the other warriors stare at her, but none of them seem ready to attack.

 

He takes her hand and gets her to sit down on a log. She looks around nervously, not sure what she’s gotten herself into. He hands her some weaved leaves filled with water and she takes a sip. He sits down next to her.

 

She glances at him with interest. “Can you teach me your language?”

 

He looks to her. “You want to learn Lakota?” he says in broken English.

 

She nods eagerly. He agrees to teach her, and the other warriors come over and help her learn too. Emily spends a few hours there, learning their language. She used her basic knowledge from school which definitely helped her to learn it quickly.

 

This was always her favourite thing to do in the parks, engross herself in the native cultures. It wasn’t what her mother liked to do, which was spend it relaxing and sunbathing. Or her father, who liked going and playing games and finding hidden gems.

 

Everything she had read was wrong. These people, or rather hosts, were not savages. They were very kind, and they seemed genuine in wanting to help her learn their language.

 

After a few hours, she had widened her vocabulary quite a bit. “I have a…” she says in Lakota, but doesn’t know how to say the next word. “Question,” she says in English.

 

The warriors surrounding her nod, waiting for her to ask. She’s nervous and does not know whether this will work, but she takes something out of her pocket. A photo of Logan.

 

“Do any of you recognise this man?” she asks, turning the photo towards them. It’s a long shot. Their memories are wiped after they die, so it’s unlikely that they’ll remember, but she thought she’d give it a shot anyway.

 

One of them takes the photo and looks at it, and then passes it onto the next person. They all pass it along until every single one of them has looked at the photo. Emily waits anxiously, and then one of them walks towards her with the photo. He crouches down in front of her. He has black paint covering the top half of his face, with red handprints on his cheeks, and a bun on top of his head with the rest of his dark hair hanging straight down.

 

“I remember,” he says, in perfect English. “I remember him.”

 

Emily is surprised, she really didn’t expect them to remember. She takes the photo back. “You remember him?”

 

He nods. “He was in bad shape, dehydrated, dead horse. I gave him water and blanket, and when I next went to check on him he was gone.”

 

She nods. It’s exactly the same story Logan had told her. How was it possible that he remembers? “You saved his life.” She smiles at him. “Thank you.”

 

He touches his hand to his heart. “Akecheta.”

 

Emily stares at him in wonder, and puts her hand on her heart. “Emily.” She holds up the photo. “This is Logan, he was my uncle.”

 

“Tell Logan,” he says, testing out the name on his tongue, trying to get the pronunciation correct. “Thank you.”

 

She nods, on the verge of tears. “He… he’s not with us anymore.”

 

Akecheta looks genuinely sad at that news. He places his hand softly on her shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

 

She nods, trying to hold back tears. “Thank you. Truly, you did save his life.”

 

This is all so surreal. Maybe these people remember more than they should. She pulls out the map and spreads it out. She puts her finger on their current location.

 

“This is where we are,” she says, making sure he understands. “See these triangles.” She points to each of them. “One of these might be where there is a facility. That’s what I’m trying to find.”

 

Akecheta takes the map and turns around. He looks over it, tracing it with his finger. He turns back to her with his finger on one of the triangles. “I know this one. It’s where the door is.”

 

“The door?”

 

He hands the map back to her. “There was a door, long time ago, but when I went back it was gone.”

 

“Gone?” she asks, confused.

 

“Buried,” he says, nodding.

 

“Buried,” she repeats. That could be it, an underground lab. That could be the place. “I think that’s what I’m looking for.”

 

He smiles. “I can show you the way.”

 

She smiles back at him. “That would be great, thank you.”

 

She stuffs the map back into her pocket, and gathers her things ready to leave. But then suddenly the mood of the Ghost Nation completely changes. They all become stiff and defensive. Akecheta heads off to investigate, his knife drawn. Suddenly she feels scared too, but she believes these people will protect her.

 

“Emily?” a voice yells. A voice she immediately recognises.

 

“Dad?” she yells accusingly, marching her way towards him. “You _fucking_ tracked me?”

 

He comes into view. He looks mad and has his gun drawn. “You told me you were going to The Raj.”

 

“Because I knew you wouldn’t let me come here,” she responds.

 

“You are in a lot of trouble, young lady,” he says grabbing onto her arm firmly.

 

“I’m old enough to come here alone,” she says angrily. “Dad, you’re _hurting_ me.”

 

He doesn’t respond and instead aims his gun at the Ghost Nation warriors. They put their hands up in surrender.

 

“No, no!!” Emily yells. “Don’t hurt them! Please… I’ll come with you, just don’t hurt them.” She stops fighting and gives in.

 

Her father lingers for a moment, but then puts his gun away and begins dragging her away.

 

“I’m sorry,” she yells back to them, in particular to Akecheta. “I’ll come and find you again, and…”

 

“No you _fucking_ won’t,” her father says sternly.

 

Akecheta is looking on at her with his hand firmly on his heart. She smiles back at him.

 

“Dad, dad,” Emily says, struggling in his tight grip. “Let me go…”

 

When the Ghost Nation is out of eyesight, he stops walking and lets go of her arm. He takes the hat off her head. “Don’t wear a white hat, it makes you a target.”

 

“What?”

 

“They see white hats as weak and easily manipulated.” He puts his hand on his black hat. “They see us as strong and not to be crossed.”

 

She shakes her head, her hair flailing wildly as she does. “I’m sorry, okay.”

 

Her dad’s face scrunches up. “Do you have any idea how _worried_ I was about you? There was no record of you in The Raj, I had no idea _where_ you were.” He pauses and looks at her.

 

“Dad…”

 

He puts his hand up, silencing her. “I looked through all the records of everyone in every park, and you were _nowhere_ to be found. Until I stumbled upon a guest named _Grace_ , in Westworld.” He eyes her.

 

She feels a little guilty. She came to the park under her middle name so it would be harder to find her.

 

“And then finding you out here, so close to…” he trails off, looking back towards the direction of the Ghost Nation.

 

Emily turns back and looks. The land is quite bare around this section and suddenly it occurs to her. “This is near where uncle Logan got lost.” Suddenly, the reason why he never wanted her to come here becomes clear. “You were scared I’d get lost like he did.” Her voice softens. “Dad, you told me yourself that they upped security and what happened to him can _never_ happen again.”

 

“That doesn’t mean that I don’t worry…” he says, and it seems as though a guard has come down around him. “All I want is to keep you safe, I didn’t want you to get hurt.”

 

“But you _can’t_ get hurt in the parks, that’s the whole appeal of this place,” she points out. “This is why you never wanted me to come here? You were afraid that I might end up like Logan?”

 

Her father nods at her. “I wanted to protect you, Emily, that’s all I’ve _ever_ wanted to do.”

 

Suddenly, all her anger and frustration melts away and she hugs her father tightly. “I’m sorry I lied.”

 

“If you were so dead set on coming here, you should have come and talked to me. We could have made an agreement, I thought we didn’t lie to each other.”

 

She pulls away and looks at him. He seems genuine, he really does, and she believes him. “I’m sorry.”

 

He sighs. “You’re safe now, that’s all that matters.”

 

She gets a grin on her face as they walk along together. “So you’re a back hat?”

 

“I’m the bad guy,” he says, grinning, as he takes his hat off and flips it back onto his head.

 

She smiles at that. In the real world, her father is the complete opposite and she finds it hard to believe that he could be something completely different when he’s in this park.


	10. Emily

Her father made an agreement with her, that she could go to any of the parks whenever she wanted, even Westworld, as long as she told him when she was going.

 

Emily thought that was fair enough, and over the years she visited the parks, in particular Westworld, quite regularly. Going to the parks alone was different to when she would come on family holidays as a child, but she really enjoyed her time there, it gave her a chance to really engross herself in the different worlds.

 

She tried to find the Ghost Nation whenever she visited Westworld, but each time she found them, they seemed different. They weren’t friendly like that first time, they were more aggressive. It seemed as though their programming had been changed. It wouldn’t surprise her if her father had something to do with that, to deter her from going near them.

 

She kept trying to follow Logan’s map, but every time she went she came up empty. She couldn’t find anything. She wanted to believe him about the project, she really did, but she began to doubt whether it even existed. Following the map was proving to be too difficult.

 

She gave it break for a while. One day she was determined to come back to it, but in the meantime, life got in the way.

 

Her mother’s drinking got worse over the years. Emily was worried about her, but she believed her father would keep his promise of taking care of her. Her parents encouraged her move out and go off to college, and she did, believing that they would be fine without her.

 

Emily would occasionally come home to check up on them. But unfortunately, each time she came home, her mothers addiction was worse. When she realised the extent of it, Emily dropped everything and moved back home.

 

She managed to get her mother to agree to go to rehab. Emily supported her throughout the whole thing, her father was trying too, but he was very busy with work.

 

Her mother would get better, but then she relapsed. But Emily always persisted, determined to help her to get better. But it was always the same cycle. She was better, and then she wasn’t.

 

It was thirteen years after Logan’s death when things became worse than ever. Her parent’s relationship was on the rocks. Her mother got flat out drunk any opportunity she could. Emily overheard one of their fights, right after they got home from a function celebrating all the charity work her father had done lately. She wasn’t happy, it was clear that things were not going well.

 

Her mother had promised when she came home from rehab the last time that _this_ time would be different. That _this_ time she would really try to stay clean. And at first, she did. But then she got increasingly worse, especially when they went to all those Delos events with her father. They always has free alcohol and refills and she always took advantage of it.

 

Emily overheard their argument that night. Logan had told her mother similar things about her father, all of the things he did in the park. And just like Emily, her mother didn’t believe it and blamed it on his addiction.

 

When her mother saw Emily in the doorway, she seemed really upset. She told her that her father was the problem, and that she’d tried to make things work but failed.

 

Just like with the things that Logan said, Emily blamed it on her addiction. She was paranoid whenever her father was around, it was like she was afraid he’d explode at any moment. She believed it was because of her drinking, but it still nagged in the back of her mind that maybe it was something else.

 

Her mother made it clear that she was not going back to rehab, but Emily didn’t see any other choice. It was hitting too close to home for her, it was too similar to what happened to her uncle Logan. She was not going to let her end up like him. She was going to help her mother, no matter what it took.

 

Emily and her father were still relatively close and they both loved Juliet. That night after her mother had gone to bed, she talked to him about sending her back to rehab. And though he was saddened by the situation, he agreed that it would be best.

 

But that night is the night that everything went wrong. Emily will never forget seeing the water dripping drown from the ceiling. Everything seeming to slow down as her father ran up the stairs. Seeing her mother’s lifeless body in the overflowing tub, an empty bottle of pills next to her. An image she will never be able to forget.

 

***

 

At her mothers funeral is when Emily completely snapped. All the people there were mainly her fathers friends, and it dawned on her that her mother never went out, except for with her father, and she really did not have many friends.

 

Emily is sitting alone in a corner, away from everything, drinking her sorrows away, when her father comes over.

 

“Emily…” he starts. “I know this is hard, it was a tragic accident…”

 

That was too much and she lost it. “An _accident?_ ” she snaps. “Mom _killed_ herself.”

 

“We don’t know that for sure,” he replies.

 

She sits up straight and looks at her father. “Are you serious? Mom wasn’t happy, she made that _very_ clear. You were _always_ away on business, and when you were home, she was paranoid around you. It seemed like she was afraid of you.”

 

She takes note of her fathers emotionless face. His wife has just died and he shows _no_ sense of emotion.

 

“I blamed it on her alcohol addiction, but maybe it wasn't that,” she continues. “Maybe _you_ were the problem the whole time.”

 

“Emily…” her father says, trying to console her.

 

“No, dad, _don’t_ touch me,” she says, standing up harshly. “You _promised_ you’d take care of her, you _promised_ me.” She begins to sob, everything unravelling all at once.

 

“Emily, you’re in mourning, I understand how…”

 

“No, no,” she says through tears. “I _believed_ you, I _trusted_ you. But you prioritised those _stupid_ parks over your _wife_.”

 

Her father stands there emotionless. “I’m sorry, I let her down.”

 

“No, _don’t_ you apologise.” She moves closer to him and talks in a low voice. “You know, mom _hated_ the parks. She _hated_ them,” she spits at him. “She only used to come because _I_ liked them.”

 

Her father looks around, noticing people beginning to stare. “Emily, maybe we should do this somewhere else…”

 

She looks around, not bothered in the slightest by the attention brought on themselves. “Oh, you _care_ what these people think of you? _None_ of these people really knew mom.”

 

He tries to put a hand on her shoulder and escort her somewhere else, but she brushes him off.

 

“I _never_ want to go to those parks again,” she says.

 

And she means it. She never wants to set foot in there again, the place where her father went while his wife drowned in her addition.

 

Emily storms out, not looking back, completely content if she never has to see her father again.


	11. Emily

Emily blamed her father mainly because she wanted someone to blame. But deep down, she blamed herself.

 

Earlier that night, after her parents argument, Emily had rang up the rehab centre. They had agreed to take her back, this time involuntarily so she wouldn’t be able to leave. She knew the way her mother felt about that place, but she saw no other option. She wanted her mother to get better.

 

It was that phone call that caused it, that’s what she believed. Because of the way their house is set up, the sound travels upwards, and it’s possible that her mother overheard. She knew how her mother felt about the rehab centre. She would have done anything to avoid going back, possibly even go as far as overdosing.

 

A week after her mother’s death, her father contacted her and said he was going away for a while on business. He was probably drowning in grief, if he even had a sympathetic bone in his body, and couldn’t stand to stay at the house. Neither could Emily. She went back to her apartment in the city and tried to distract herself.

 

Emily became estranged from her father, they didn’t keep in contact at all. She assumed he was still at Delos, working away his guilt. But honestly, she didn’t care. She really did not ever want to go back to the parks.

 

Almost a year later, after she’d had time to grieve and process things, she went back home. The house was untouched, exactly as she’d left it. For so long she hadn’t been able to go back, but she knew she eventually had to face it.

 

She walks into the empty house. The house that was always far too big for just the three of them. Her footsteps echo as she walks to the kitchen. She runs her hand over the kitchen bench and a layer of dust coats her finger.

 

She puts her foot on the first step of the grand staircase and looks up. She glances over at the chandelier, still haunted by when there was water dripping down. She slowly walks up the stairs, counting them to keep herself calm. The door to the bathroom is shut, there’s no way she can bear to look in there. The wooden floor is still water stained.

 

She makes her way to her bedroom and pushes the door, which creaks open. All of her childhood memories are wrapped up in there. She never bothered to sort through it all.

 

The house will need to be sold, there is no way she or her father are going to move back in. She heads up to the attic and finds some folded up cardboard boxes. She brings them into her room and sits cross legged on the floor and begins to sort through her stuff. Things to throw out, things to give to charity, and things to keep.

 

One of the first items she finds is an elephant pillow. It used to be her favourite thing as a child. Her favourite comfort item. Suddenly everything comes rushing back to her all at once. Her stupid obsession with elephants is what led her to going to the parks in the first place.

 

It also reminds her of Logan, of the necklace he gave her, the one she never used to take off. Her hand instinctively goes to her neck, but of course it’s bare. She hasn’t worn it for years.

 

She is suddenly full of anger. She screams into the pillow and then throws it at the wall. When did everything go wrong? Was anything ever even right?

 

If she’d just stayed at home and not gone to college, if she’d kept a close eye on her mother, maybe she could have helped her. Then she might not have needed to be sent back to rehab, and Emily wouldn't have needed to make that phone call. Then maybe she’d still be here.

 

She suddenly breaks down in tears. She misses her. She misses her more than anything.

 

“I’m sorry, mom," she sobs. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.”

 

She pushes herself up off the ground and carefully walks over to her parent's bedroom, trying not to make the floor creak. She puts her hand on the door handle and pushes it down. It squeaks, it’s been so long since it was last opened. She longs to feel close to her mother, in any way that she can.

 

Immediately a scent wafts out, the smell of her mothers perfume, and she almost breaks down again. She stops at the door and takes the room in. It’s neat and tidy, exactly the way her mother left it. Her father hadn’t been in here since… since that night.

 

She can’t leave her mom’s stuff here, she needs to pack it up and take it somewhere safe. She gets a cardboard box and brings it into her parents room. First, she takes the books off the bookshelf and neatly stacks them into the box, along with the bookends and a few stray magazines. She’s not going to throw anything away yet, it’s all she has left of her.

 

She moves onto the dresser. Her mother’s expensive jewellery hanging up neatly, as everything of hers always was. She picks up one of the necklaces and looks at it closely. Diamonds, a gift from her father no doubt. He’d always come back from a work trip with an expensive gift for her.

 

Next she moves onto the first drawer of the dresser, and her heart immediately stops. It’s the jewellery box, the one that Emily received on her sixteenth birthday. The one she threw out, because she was mad at her mother because she was no longer a dancer. She threw it in the trash, and when she went to retrieve it, it was gone. She thought it was long gone. But here it was. Her mother had it. She must have taken it out of the trash. She kept it for all those years.

 

Emily breaks down in tears. She felt immense guilt over that whole thing for years, she never really got over it. Her mother bought a beautiful gift and she thanked her by throwing it out. She blamed herself for her mothers addiction. She thought she was a bad daughter, and she never told her how much she loved and appreciated her.

 

But, why keep it here? She could have stored it in the attic, or anywhere really. But she chose to leave it here, in an obvious place. If her father had found it, it would not have meant anything to him. This was between her mother and her. Emily lets out a long breath. Her mother _wanted_ her to find it.

 

Emily braces herself and slowly opens up the lid. The dancing ballerina comes to life and the eerie music begins to play. A shiver goes down her spine as something shiny catches her eye in the bottom of the box. Her mother did leave her something. She picks it up and holds it up in the light. A computer chip.

 

There must be something on here that she wanted her to see, that must be why she left it. Emily sits down at the dresser and places the chip on the tablet screen. It comes to life. It asks her for a fingerprint. She places her finger on and it accepts. The Delos symbol appears right in the middle.

 

Different menu options appear and she flicks through them. She clicks on one and video clips start playing. Her father is in all of them, and then she realises what it is. Her father’s history in the parks.

 

She flicks through them and what she sees horrifies her. Everything comes at her fast and it all blurs together. She sees her father dragging a girl into a barn. She recognises her, the host from her grandfathers retirement party, the one Logan said he fell in love with. She thought he was delusional, she couldn’t believe that it could be true.

 

She flicks through some more. There are ones of him shooting hosts, stabbing hosts, torturing hosts. She knew her father wore a black hat when he went to the park, he even admitted he was a bad guy when he was in there, but this is not what she was expecting. All of this horror he inflicted in the park… he was a completely different person in there.

 

Clips and images of her father when he was younger appear. She flicks through and braces herself to see her uncle Logan appear, but there is no trace of him. Did her father erase that? She checks the dates. This history only started _after_ his first visit, meaning Logan won’t be on here. She wishes she could have seen that trip, to validate Logan’s story, but there is no proof now. Only Logan’s word, which she was now starting to believe.

 

Suddenly, another logo appears. It’s familiar, two hexagons intersecting each other. It was the same symbol as on Logan’s map. She knows what it means. The secret project.

 

Her grandfather appears on the screen. He’s in a white room, and her father comes and visits him. Was this the treatment centre where they were treating his illness? She flicks through more and it can’t be. Because her father visited him many times, and the dates don’t add up. Her father visited when he was older, much older. The last time must have been only a couple of years ago. But her grandfather never ages.

 

Suddenly it all clicks into place. Why her father could not wait for her grandfather to die. All the times he went away on business after his death. The secret project, where they were collecting data on the guests. They weren’t just using it to sell the guests products, they were using it to make copies of them.

 

All of it is too overwhelming and Emily had seen enough. She takes the chip off and looks at it. How could this hold so much horror? All the things that Logan said, it was all true. All of it.

 

She was naive when she was younger, she though the project was about blackmailing people, selling them products, making a profit. Her father was always proud when the parks racked in more money each year. It seemed to be what he valued most. But there was one thing he valued above that… his youth.

 

He always talked fondly of his younger days. Emily never thought much of it, he liked talking about it, so what? She didn’t think he actually wanted to _be_ younger again. To stay young forever…

 

But that’s exactly what the project was, turning people into hosts. Putting their consciousness into them, so that they could live forever. So that her father could live forever.

 

She puts her head in her hands and cries out in frustration. She should have stopped it years ago. She should have tried harder. She goes back to her room and finds the scrunched up map of Logan’s that he gave her all those years ago. She kept it in a safe place because she’d promised him that one day she would expose the project.

 

She finds an old blank sketchbook and sits back down at the dresser. She copies the map, as best as she can, although some of the lines have faded but she uses her knowledge to fill in the blanks.

 

She now believed everything that Logan told her about her father. The things that her mother seemed to believe too. All the horrors he inflicted in the park, everything was true. Her father lied to her about everything, and she was stupid enough to believe him. Everything she thought she knew about him was a lie.

 

Her uncle and mother were not the ones who were sick. Her father was.


	12. Emily

Emily hadn’t heard from her father for almost a year. They’d become estranged. She didn't want to see him. She assumed that he’d buried himself in his work to distract himself.

 

But despite everything, for some reason she still cared about him. He would not reply to messages or phone calls or anything. So she called up Delos Destinations and asked to be put through to her father.

 

But they couldn’t put her through to him, because he wasn’t there at the headquarters. He had been in the Westworld park for almost a year. After everything she’d seen on the profile chip, that didn’t surprise her in the slightest.

 

He was letting his grief and anger out by frolicking around in the park. He’d been there for almost a _year_. What was he hoping to find? Or was he hoping to never leave?

 

She was going to have to to go to the park and find him. She didn’t have much of a plan, but she decided that she was going to start in The Raj, as that was the park she knew best. She would then cross the border, as Logan said that was possible, and then make her way to Westworld where it would be harder to track her.

 

It wasn’t a great plan, she’d never crossed the border of a park before, but she knew the relative way to there form The Raj. She’d figure out a plan once she was in there. She just needed to confront her dad and expose his _fucked_ up project.

 

***

 

When Emily arrives at Delos Destinations, crowds of rich, well dressed people line the gates. A rich peoples playground, that’s what Logan used to say. Seeing things now with a new perspective, she believed that more than ever.

 

She gives the name Grace when she signs in, the name she always chooses to give when she comes to the parks. She supposes just like her father, the parks are somewhere she can be somebody else.

 

She choses her clothes, comfortable hunting clothes, and a dress if she feels like dressing up. And a bag with a collection of different guns. As hunting was illegal, people came here to kill hyperrealistic animals because it was just as satisfying at the real thing.

 

The more she thought about what the parks actually were, the more she realises how messed up they are. Logan was right, she should have listened to him more.

 

She gets on the train and rides with a whole bunch of other guests. She watches out the window. The familiar surroundings come into view, the place that was so familiar to her as a child. When they get dropped off, she looks up in awe. She sees elephants in the distance, the elephants that she loved, the whole reason she wanted to come here in the first place. She used to be so in love with this place, she still remembers the first time she came here. It was everything she could have ever dreamed of.

 

All these memories come flooding back, of all those times they came here, happy family memories. Or at least she thought they were happy memories. But looking back now, she sees things differently. Her father wasn’t happy, he was always distracted. Obviously not enjoying the calmness of this park if his his profile chip is anything to go by. The Raj was too tame for his liking. And her mother was afraid of the elephants, she wouldn’t go near them.

 

Emily puts her bag down and checks the front pocket of her pants. She feels the outline of the profile chip. She can’t lose it, she needs it when she confronts her father. She takes her scrapbook out and opens to the page with the hand drawn map of Westworld. She has a general idea of where the border is and how to get to there from here.

 

She was panning to get right on her mission; make her way to Westworld, find her dad, get him to take her to the projects facility and then expose it. But she hears faint music coming from the town. It hits something deep in her heart. There is so much nostalgia associated with this place. After all the _shit_ her father has put her through, she might as well have some fun in this place before it’s shut down.

 

And, it suddenly occurs to her, she’s old enough to go to the pleasure houses now. She smirks at the thought. She needed to let loose and relax, and forget about everything, even just for a little while. She was going to expose her father, and she was going to get justice for what he did to Logan and her mother. She was determined to, no matter what it took.

 

She suddenly stops in her tracks and feels an ounce of sympathy towards her father. She doesn’t know where it comes from, considering everything he’s done, but it’s there. As much as she hates him, he is still family. She decides that she’ll give him one more chance. If the parks get shut down and he agrees to come home and try to mend their relationship, then she would try to forgive him. After all, he was the only family she had left now.

 

She begins to make her way towards the hotel, but then stops when she remembers something that Logan told her. Guests data is collected when they interact with hosts. Any host that she interacts with will be gathering data on her.

 

Well, who says she has to hook up with a host? Surely there are some guests visiting the park who would be interested. Although the hosts these days were very realistic, so she’d need to make _absolutely_ sure. The project most likely had a lot of data on her already, she didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of having any more.

 

She places her hand on the handle of her shotgun and grins. She knows one way to find out whether someone is a host or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for reading! I had a great time writing this and delving deeper into Logan and Emily's backstories. Thanks again and hope you enjoyed it :)


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